life ruiner

its easy to pass your judgements

when you don't walk in my skin

yet you find it ok to try my life on 

like a pair of shoes

but when it doesn't suit you

off it goes

i have to live this

i have to make it my own

so no i don't think your judgements matter

and no i don't feel like you are worth my time anymore

you pretended your way into my world

said everything i've ever wanted to hear

and shielded your pathetic little body with mine

i took the damage

i took the brunt of it

for you

you convinced me you were worth it

and i believed you

and when things were so far in

when the roots were so ingrown

you dropped me on my head

pulled the rug out from underneath me

and everything in my world crashed and broke around me

and there you stood

like a scared little girl

apologizing, with her hands to her mouth

sorry doesn't cut it

you asked me to trust you

so i did

you asked me to love you

so i did

you asked to be a part of my world

you were the one that came to me

so i let you in

and you burned it to the ground

we were trying to build foundations for life

on the ground of a scared little girl

who swore she knew who she was

who swore she understood 

and at the worst moment, you backed out

you fucked me over

and you ruined my life

so you'll have to forgive me

if i don't look at you so friendly anymore

my life is in shambles

and its because of you

your words mean shit to me

because i've had time to look at what they mean

and they are hollow

you are are hollow

and you don't mean the things you say

you just don't have the guts to stand on your own to feet

so you lean on other people

like a fucking leech

living off other people

you are scum

you are the reason people kill themselves

you are the reason that understanding between two people will never be achieved

all because of people like you

who don't have the balls to admit to themselves that they are hurting people

you are so good at lying to yourself

its your last line of defense

you pull the wool over your own eyes

cause you'd rather not see the truth

it makes you pick at your skin

it makes you look in the mirror

and see ugliness

cause the truth fucking hurts

you are ugly

and you are embarrassing

and you should be destroyed

have it your way

it'll all gonna come down on your head in the end

and i will have my revenge

i will wait it out

to find you when you are down

and kick your teeth in

i want to really drive it home

that you are the one to blame

you are the reason for other peoples pain and suffering

and you can run away

and create a new identity for yourself all you want

you can jump on this new bandwagon

and throw some labels on yourself

but we all know you

and we know how hollow you are

and you look like a joke

you're a broken fawn trying to convince herself she's a buck

you aren't capable

you never were

its pathetic

set my own bones

and through it all

i nursed the cuts and bruises

i set my own bones

i learned something important

you still haven't broken me

and you never will

a house is not a home

and the people who are supposed to be there

seldom ever are

but thats not a reason to give up

and it doesn't mean a thing

so this ones for us who get back up

who take a punch and smile through our blood

the hurt doesn't even stop us anymore

you cannot rattle me

you'll never stop me

i do what i want, when i want

and i don't bother anyone

i came from the womb

into a hell on earth

but i have made it into something beautiful

a positive from a negative

a diamond from a rock

a rose from concrete

and what i have created 

will continue on long after my bones have turned to dust

do what you want to me

theres no stopping it now

i am in the air

i am one with time

and never forget, i know you never will

that i beat you

i beat you all

i proved my worth

i proved that i was right

and i made you all eat your goddamn words

and all you scum bags that call yourselves my family

have been removed from my life

because my presence is a privilege

and i will not be taken for granted

i have the power to move mountains

i can make it rain

i can invoke something out of nothing

what have you ever done

all the jealousy that made you beat me down

all the heartache i've had to endure

has harden my skin

and made a fortress out of this tired body

i am well fortified and ready for war

test me

i dare you

greater men have tried

and greater woman have taken me for everything i am worth

and in the morning

i wake up, i stand up, i stretch, and i move on

unscarred, unbroken

i have seen the bottom

i have painted its walls

i have been abandoned

i have stripped of everything

and each time i rebuilt

each time i overcame the odds

and now i am a man

with unwavering strength

and a heart still pure

and not one of the predators on this earth

will ever be above me

parent is just a word to me

im a product of the world

but i wont let my past

determine my future

and i wont let you lesser beings

keep me from greater things

everything i have

everything i've done

i've done it all on my own

i've never had a home

so i'll build it myself

all on my own

i'll build my own home

i'll set my own bones

and i'll load my own guns

to keep the wolves at bay

to keep the scum out of my way

i will make a real rain

and wash the trash away

this is my world

you are just living in it

i will make you live in fear

im going to murder you with this knife in my back