The Media Generation

 

Two idiots aggrandizing each other

Talking at the tv like they have a clue

Mind numb and hypnotized by a box

Can't even see how they resemble monkeys at the zoo

Screaming and throwing their shit

Bunch of assholes tossing their own salad on the internet

While making comments about freedom and their rights

Literally exploiting themselves

But how dare anyone take advantage of them

An influencer of nothing but narcissism

And I'm supposed to take your word on anything?

By all means, mouth off and talk down on people

But play the victim when they defend themselves

Attack like a coward, and cry weak tears

About you being the one who's oppressed

If you want to be respected, respect yourself first

Have some class, or be taken for an object

You all talk a big game

But one push and you all fall apart

Then we all watch

As you choke on your witty little quips

And your tough guy quotes

In the end, they're just talk

All you really ever do is talk

Wolves tear the throats out of their enemies

You just bleed out in the wilderness, like anything else

No one around to hear your sob story

No one to care about your outrage

You just die in the cold

You exist among wolves

In your safe little bubble, so easily popped

Run your mouth and get bled out like anything

Give us a reason

We dare you

All just waiting

To tear your throat out

Celebrate our Mediocrity like Flies on Shit

 

Little fucking heroes

Weak little victims

Tears and tissues

Blankets and cocoa

Your pain is so important

Your outrage, recreational

Tired of your mouth

More value in your blood

Spilled from every angle

So your carcass stops talking

No, nothing is safe

Yet we are all still fine

But you cower in fear

As you whine on about injustice

You've never earned any respect

Your life has never had reason

Shat out of your mothers womb

To rotting and stinking in the earth

Making everyone else

Turn their heads in disgust

You've never been impressive

You've never deserved attention

Useless and unimportant

A celebration of mediocrity

In all it's boring glory

Fuck you, and all your kind

I've seen the end of this movie already

Let me tell you how it ends

Chewed up and spit out

Trust

 smile for the camera

even though you don't feel it inside

even when its nearly done

clawing its way out

lose your mind in intervals

and if you're lucky

they will glamorize your decay

and make you the new anti-hero

everyone loves a good car crash

everything you love and hold precious

will be homogenized

all the purities rung out

and you are left with a husk

like a taxidermied body

with all the bones removed

this is what the world has in store

for the children you want

your house, car and family

will be dangled in front of your eyes

while they take turns

fucking you from behind

i am tired of not being allowed

my own small place in this world

only where they delegate and approve of

thats where i belong

my anger and contempt is not a mood

its a symptom

a bi-product of being born

in a house on fire

now, even the few things that i had

to keep me grounded

are losing their content

i am becoming untethered from the world

the only logical next step

is death

intelligence will amount to alienation

to loneliness

you see through the drapes

that they hang on the dirt

you can only cover the dirt so much

its still dirt

I'm losing a war

that i never wanted to fight

i only realized i was fighting

when it was too late to quit

Inbox Empty, Phone not Ringing

 

I stopped wanting people, with any passion, in my thirties

I stopped trying to recreate the fantasy over and over

And just let things be what they are

Slightly disappointing and average

I stopped looking for kisses that made my heart flutter

Just kisses the wont run away in fear

I made my peace with how broken all of this is

I realized that my appetites were unquenchable

And it's not fair to ask that of another person

I realized that chasing the high is not just reserved for drugs

But for relationships too

I have never found a bottom to the well inside of me

I keep swimming down there but it just keeps going

But I have sure bottomed out on the well inside other people

I was born a social animal, yes

I am still a human

But something changed inside of me

My idea of social is a far greater distance

Than anyone elses idea

I like you just fine, over there

With a couple of yards between us

Where I can't smell your fear

Where I can't watch your thoughts turn

Like clockwork in your head

Where you can't hear me talk to myself

The only true friend I'll ever have

Where you have to raise your voice to ask me questions

Where things can get lost in translation

Always a slight distance, always space

People get too close and they break things

Punch holes in my walls, break my heart

Those days are over now

No more letting them inside

I stopped needing them that much

I stopped feeling that way about them

I stopped caring much at all

Don't raise awareness, we do not care.

 

I saw a bracelet for sale to raise awareness for suicide prevention, and I instantly went to anger. Sure, let’s sell a bracelet so we can all show off to our friends that we are troopers in the fight against suicide. This company is making money off of suicide and the suffering of others, yet they’re quick to bitch about drug dealers getting rich off the suffering of others. The hypocrisy nauseates me. Let's capitalize on suicide!!!!

I feel like commenting on the post as a suicidal person and introducing myself as the very thing they are against.

“Hi there, suicidal person here. Yep, hospital records to prove it. Anyway, how much of these bracelets are you selling? Making quite the profit, huh? Well I can honestly tell you that you will not stop me from killing myself with your stupid bracelet, and the very idea of the exchange of any money for something like this just confirms all our suspicions that you outsiders, who have never had suicidal thoughts, are completely missing the point."

This idiotic act of raising awareness for suicide is the very thing that makes suicidal people kill themselves. It’s the banality of the world at large, and the constant annoyance and berating of morons who can only think and function in one way, that anyone else who might operate outside of those parameters is not accepted and does not belong to our society.

Raise all the awareness you want. Raise it so much so you can all watch us as we put a gun to our head and pull the trigger. Good for you, back pats for everyone, all you really did was put all the eyes on us as we actually commit the act.

Your awareness will not stop anyone. It wont prevent suicide. I say this as a person who is constantly having thoughts of taking his life. None of this makes me feel like anyone has my back, or gives me second thoughts. I don’t care about your opinions on my suicide. That’s the point in the first place; throwing it all away.

Why are we so convinced that any of it was all that great to begin with? Have any of you ever stopped and asked yourselves that? Sure, there are good things in life, I’ll give you that, but it’s not enough. For someone like me, it’s never enough. No amount of sunshine or feel good movie is going to make it enough for me to want to live and not take myself out.

The clueless-ness of all of these groups that want to prevent suicide is staggering. I’ve looked in to all of them and not one of you have found the real point. None of you get it. You always make it about yourselves and how it hurts your feelings when someone takes themselves away from you. I dunno, maybe it is you! I can’t say for certain, but this allying yourself with the suicidal is not going to ease your heart or save your soul. You are not one of us. We are not the same. You will never understand it, and we will never feel like you understand. We will never speak to each other as equals because I have seen with eyes that see behind the curtain of all of this, from a perspective that puts the whole thing into it’s pointless conclusion.

You have to accept the fact that sometimes people kill themselves to get the fuck away from people like you. So what are you doing that’s so bad? Existing.

There’s nothing anyone can do about it. You are just living your lives as you are. We cannot change you. We cannot bring you to our side our come to some understanding, it doesn’t work that way. Your lives and watching you live them is a constant gag reel on repeat, everyday, watching the same old crap and watching the same old mistakes.

People like me can make the deduction that nothing can be done about this, because the problem is too big for anyone to tackle. The problem is bigger than the will of man. You will never stop a truly suicidal person, and anyone who has been stopped wasn’t really wanting to do it in the first place. A cry for help is not the same thing as living in a suicidal existence, where everything pales in comparison, where every joy, every love cannot compare to the allure of just ending it all and letting it all go.

You cannot save us, because we don’t want to be saved. There is nothing to save. I cannot bring you to my side any more than you can bring me to yours, and the only difference is that people like you cannot sit comfortably with that fact, while we can.