waiting
0i keep waiting for the end
and it never comes
all i want is for it all to be over
and everyday, another day
you have every reason to live
i don't care
i don't want reasons
i just want a warm place
to lay down
close my eyes
and slowly drift away
and not wake up again
we all just find distractions
we keep ourselves busy
dodging the hard evidence
that its all pointless
and you are all alone
you're alone in a room full of people
you're alone when she's cuddle next to you sleeping
none of this is real
none of this is permanent
and it will go away
faster than i can take it all in
it will leave before i am done with it
never satisfied
constantly thirsty
i feel as hollow now as the day i gained consciousness
this hole in my chest has been there
since as long as i can remember
and nothing has ever made me feel whole
theres no such thing as filling a void
i don't believe in love
i don't believe in god
and i go to sleep every night
alone
nothing changes
things just get more dismal
i just get more bitter
more cynical
i fake a smile
a play the role
go through the motions
make sure everyone isn't worrying about me too much
and every night i go to sleep alone
and every morning i wake up alone
because that is the way that it is
and that is a constant that will not change
i have never found anything worth living for
but i have a million reasons to die
and i've looked harder than most
there is nothing out there
stop that shit
stop fucking trying
just go about your business
the world is full of suckers willing to take you in
you can make a fine life feeding off people
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