Boring Chemical Dependency

love was never what everyone told me it would be

sex wasn't either, for that matter

neither of them saved my life

or made much of a difference

i've gone long periods without them

and never gave it much thought or missed them

i miss who i was before these things became a factor

before it was expected of me as an adult

the loneliest times i've ever had

were when i was in love

and sex has always been a boring chemical dependency

you turn that switch on

and you can't turn it off

it's nothing more complicated than that

the older i get

the more the idea screams at me

to leave all these shit heads behind

and get the fuck out of this place

to never introduce myself

to another person ever again

and never let anyone in

cause none of them fucking deserve it anyway

earn it

or keep walking