A GUTTER WHERE IT USED TO BE

a broken down whore with a gutter where 'it' used to be
the last time she felt anything good was ages ago
i have no respect for people who lose themselves without having a good enough reason to be lost
you're just like the rest
and you could be something to be proud of
you were born with a chance to change
to roll your own dice, and make it work the way you wanted
all you needed was a little strength
but its easier to let go of a falling wall
and never try to learn how to rebuild it
i feel sorry for you
and i resent you for all the times you told me i was the one who needed change
and i believed you, because i loved you
i did my part
where are you
its your turn
you're off somewhere sleeping it off
walking the fine line between caring and not caring who you're waking up next to
or what you did with them the night before
do you make your parents proud?
is that the problem? that they never gave a shit enough to be proud?
that doesn't give you the right to waste away the things you were born with
a brain, a heart, lungs, life
fuck you for not overcoming
fuck you for never learning from your mistakes
fuck you for the lies you told so well, and i believed
oh i believed
you fought so hard to build your life so that you would never be on your own
and all the fighting just made you become the thing you were afraid of being
cold and alone, on your own
with no good ear to talk to, and no one left to trust
maybe that's not what you want out of life
maybe you just want to be unhappy
you're trying to make the fantasy into reality
that's what it looks like to me
i get it now
i got to close
you pushed me away cause i got to close to your secrets
and you don't want to change your ways
cause you love being the damaged little girl
hiding behind her beauty
i saw all your secrets
and they were nothing special
you're hiding fools gold
you traded me in for sand
it just slips through your fingers
while i was always something you could really hold on to
so since you seem to have it all right
you tell me how that's fair
you tell me how that's right
fuck you
forever