THE FAWN

i see what shes doing
and she doesnt think i see it
shes trying to play the game
and get under my skin
shes trying to bend my mind
to make me believe all her lies
i dont believe in anything, anymore
shes trying to make me stay away from people she feels is a threat
shes trying to stake her claim on my heart, on my dick, on my body
shes trying to make me feel like nothing will ever make me feel the way she makes me feel ever again
i dont believe those lies
now shes trying to run away to make me beg her to come back
and when i dont she'll chalk it up as my fault in her mind
i dont play games
i dont ruin lives
i live my own life, and if you want to come share some time with me
thats alright by me
but if you want to try to carve your name in my heart
thats where i draw the line
i am not a posession
im not something you can own
i dont belong to you
and your hands can touch me because i chose to let them
sure, you are smart
i cant tell that much
but your flaw is that you hate yourself
you dont accept yourself the way you are
you think youre terrible and that deters you from every doing anything worth anything
it keeps you down
keeps you......underground
ive done all i feel comfortable doing to try to tell you different
but i see now that you need to feel that way cause it validates the way you live
you love to be scared all the time
you love to fuck yourself over
so maybe you really are the terrible person you think you are
but the thing about it is...
you never were before
you convinced yourself that you were
so you fortified youself from an early age
and in doing so transformed yourself into the monster that you most feared to become
and you did it behind your own back
almost as if by accident
its too late now
youre the fawn with the broken leg
the terribly insecure
but a monster inside
because you can never really just switch it off can you
no, you dont want to
you dont want things this way
im not even gonna hold my breath
im not gonna shed a tear
i wont even have a stomach pain or two
im just gonna keep on keepin on like i always do
cause im over the whole "gettin over you" thing
my heart doesnt hurt for people anymore
if you think thats sad, well then i think youre sad
cause i dont need to hurt anymore
i dont need to hold on to my pain
i dont need to prove to myself that im worthless
i know what i am doing
and you'll just always be the fawn
laying in the field
with a broken leg