kill yourself you miserable fuck

we dont need you
and everything is all your fault
the bruises disappear
skin always heals
but the mind never does

and i remember everything
i've been forced to eat my feelings
and swallow my emotions for as long as my memory goes back
like filling a balloon with too much air
all stretched out and ruptured

i spend every free moment now
trying to relax
trying to make up for lost time
on account of getting smacked in the face
for every little thing
the scars of child abuse
running parallel with my veins
while she gets to go on with her life
and block it all out of her mind

my mind doesn't work that way
every hit is branded in my memory
and i wake up to it everyday
but who gives a fuck how i feel
and what i wake up with on my psyche
every fucking day of my life